Oyster and Babe on a special day.
Tomma and Parsifal.
L: Oyster and Babe Bump: “It’s complicated, but we wouldn’t change a thing!” R: Tomma on Parsifal: “He really gets me!”
Professor Almond and Loki
Fantur Nen and Artanaro Nar
L. The lucious Professor Almond with the utterly lucious Loki Laufeyjarson. R. Fantur Nen and Artanaro Alma have their own kind of lucious–except nobody knows exactly what kind it is!

Yes, these four dyads are the most swoony, as far as I’m concerned. However The Guild of Ornamental Hermits, consisting of human “Hermits” and Elves from The Realm, with a little help from Lucky LaFey (aka Norse god Loki) and assorted members of his extended family, contain many other passionate pairings and groupings. And not all dyads are exclusive.

L to R: Who’s There, Septimus, Babe, Oyster, Tomma, Maud, Parsifal.

The overlapping relationships: Babe and Oyster are deeply in love, but Oyster is asexual (though panromantic). So Babe sometimes spends “quality time” with Who’s There and Septimus. Tomma is also important to both Babe and Oyster, and they’ve even proposed to zir, as a unit! Tomma loves them back, but also has a new love, Parsifal. Parsifal is married to Maud and they have a child, Breadcrumb. So Tomma’s relationship with Parsifal also includes a relationship with Maud. (Elves are usually pansexual.)

But wait, there’s more!

Maximus and Maxine
Maxine and Sybil
Maximus and Sybil
The triad of Maximus, Maxine, and Sybil. Fond friends and lovers.

Few divorces have been as amicable as that of Maximus Gordon and Sybil Perry. For many years they were together as the progressive folk duo, Gordon & Perry. They moved to Hermitville about twenty years ago and Maximus, a man of many skills and abilities, designed and built quite a lot of the eco-pods and other buildings. Sybil helped run a music program in the public elementary schools in Puna, and the two of them settled into life in Hawai’i Island. However, after a time, they decided to end life as a married couple and continue as friends. When Maxine arrived in Hermitville sometime later, Maximus was smitten and the two of them fell in love. However, neither of them would commit to monogamy, and when Maximus confessed his past explorations in kink with his ex-wife Sybil, Maxine became intrigued. Maxine and Sybil also became good friends and eventually lovers. Thus a fond kinky triad rooted and grew in Hermitville. There’s no doubt that they all have each other’s backs as well as each other’s kinks.

Sidley Croom and Joe Hillstrom
Stanford Lawsome
Septimus and Maud
L: Sidley Croom and Joe Hillstrom. Middle: Stanford Lawsome. R: Septimus and Maud.

Sidley Croom and Joe Hillstrom have a complicated, on again-off again, relationship. They were together for many years in San Francisco, but when they broke up Joe moved to Hermitville at Ginger’s request. When Sidley moved there too, they got together again, sometimes as friends with “benefits” and sometimes trying for something that felt more permanent. But it’s been hard for both Joe and Sidley to strike a balance between their outside interests and their own intimacy. In the books, Sidley has flirted with the creepy Stanford Lawsome (Anna Phylaxia’s personal assistant) while also entertaining some fantasies about Anna. Sidley was also intrigued by both Septimus and Maud when the two Elves–posing as European circus and cabaret performers–set out to deliberately distract Sidley away from the Hermitville property, for an afternoon of dining, drinking, and hiking (never a good mix in Puna!).

As for Septimus and Maud, well, they have history too…

For more on relationships in The Guild of Ornamental Hermits, read an earlier blog post, You Need a Scorecard to Keep Track.